I have always been fascinated by people’s behavior, especially how they behave under stressful situations.
We all have 3 natural responses to danger.
These can be illustrated by imagining that you are a sleeping caveman who wakes up to the roar of a grizzly bear outside the entrance.
Your family are also behind you deeper in the darkness.
Do you choose…
1) Fight (attack the bear giving your family time to escape and possibly sacrificing your own life in the process)?
2) Flight (run as fast as you can from the cave hoping your family will run away too and the bear will react too slowly to hurt anybody)?
3) Freeze (play dead and hope that the bear has already eaten and therefore doesn’t come any closer because there is nothing of active interest here)?
The odds are you won’t actually make that decision, your subconscious mind will probably have already done it for you.
Consider when you are driving and a car or person pulls out in front of you… you’ll slam on your brakes and make an emergency stop AND THEN start to wonder what just happened. If you’d taken the time to rationalize it, you’d probably have already hit them.
Your subconscious mind has a number of protective elements that will let you run on autopilot. You can sometimes counter them consciously but when you do so, this can leave clues.
Take lying for instance…
Q.1 Who lies more: men or women?
Men lie 1.5 times more than women, telling an average of 3 lies a day.
Men are significantly more likely to lie than women, with the average male telling 3 lies a day or 1,092 a year compared to women who only lie twice a day or 728 times a year.
Q.2: What do women lie about more than men?
A.2: Women more likely to lie in certain situations like hiding new clothes from a partner, with 39% feeling the need to lie about their latest purchase compared to 26% of men.
Women are also more likely to tell a lie or pretend to be busy to avoid a phone call, 50% admitting that they have lied to dodge a phone call compared to just 35% of men. And they are more likely to lie about their weight and age!
And overall, 1 in 10 people admit to giving inaccurate accounts of their current relationship status… wonder how that pans out across men and women?
Q.3: What percentage of people say they have “never” lied on their CV or in a job interview?
A.3: Just 8%! So at least 92% have lied on their CV or in a job interview. Let’s hope that doctors, brain surgeons, pilots and bankers are amongst the honest 8%!!
Q.4: What percentage think it’s OK to lie to their boss about being sick to get a day off?
A.4: 20% think that there’s nothing wrong with pretending to be sick to get time off, and 40% admit to having done this.
Q.5 What percentage of teens lie to their parents?
A.5 98% of teens say they lie to their parents. Interestingly, 98% of teens also say that trust is very important in personal relationships and 96-98% say that lying is immoral!
Interesting isn’t it.
One of my favourite TV shows over the last few years was ‘Lie To Me’ starring Tim Roth as cantankerous genius Cal Lightman – a human lie detector.
Take a look at this clip…
The show is based on the work of Paul Ekman probably the foremost expert in emotional behavior and specifically what happens when people don’t tell the truth.
Paul also trains people to learn what he knows and I am going to put all this to the test.
It’s all happening in Dubai.
You can attend the course run by Dr Leila Edwards and her team at the Transformations Institute and learn how to read anyone, anytime and anywhere.
For more information:Dr Leila Edwards Managing Director & Principal Direct Line: +971 (0) 4 344 0115 Mobile/SMS: +971 (0) 50 474 5613 e-mail: firstname.lastname@example.org http://www.transforminst.com/